My morning yoga class was cancelled.
So I tried to go for a ride.
There were storm clouds brewing.
It was a gamble.
But I felt I needed to move.
I went right out my driveway, and I wasn’t pedalling too hard. All good.
I turned right again and felt like I slapped in the face by a wall of wind.
I thought ... “I’m really not enjoying this.”
So I turned right at the next street and headed towards the shops.
Easier but still windy.
Then I thought ... “Maybe I can do my circuit backwards, might be less windy.”
It wasn’t ...
So as I battled to pedal along a flat road, with stray milk cartons and chip packets flying past me, I had another thought ...
“What if I ride back home and then drive to the cafe to write my blog.”
That felt good. I turned the bike around.
But another voice said ...
“What about your ride? You’ve hardly started. That’s pretty slack.”
And I took a deep breath.
My inner critic was very loud and feisty today.
I said to that voice: “It doesn’t feel good to do this right now. I can’t write an inspiring blog for my tribe if I’m all angry and resentful.”
I took another deep breath.
My inner critic grumbled under her breath (like my sister when she’s mad).
She knew I was right.
So I rode home and drove to the warm, comfortable cafe and I feel much happier inside.
Have you ever had that inner conversation?
Where your soul says: ‘stop pushing, trying, struggling, beating yourself up and be more loving to yourself.’
But your ego says: ‘you said you’d do this, it’s hard, you aren’t enjoying it, but you SHOULD do it anyway.’
The thing that is interesting to me in this scenario is, how mean I was being to myself. Why? What purpose does that serve? Other than making me feel awful.
Sometimes we have to pull ourselves up and go ‘HEY! ... hey ... heeeey.’
Insert ‘big self hug’ here.
Fact is I can ride another day or even later today (if the wind dies down).
Or I can do other types of moving inside - like dancing (I love the Body Groove videos by Misty Tripoli).
Or there is another yoga class tonight.
This week I ask you to be aware of where you are being mean to yourself?
Take a breath.
Stop and give yourself a hug.
You can be your greatest love and dearest friend.
P.s. If you would like to do something very loving for yourself check out the Full moon sound healing & meditation with Jana and Pip ... on Saturday 14th Sept. Purchase tickets by clicking this link: www.pipcoleman.com/store
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